Happily Ever After

What happens to Snow White and her prince after they are proclaimed to live happily ever after? What is happily ever after, even - does it mean happy on average, or more than half of the time? Is there room for any unhappiness in happily ever after?

Does happily ever after mean that Snow White and the prince never argue, that the prince never drinks too much which makes him say brash things because Snow White used to live with seven men? Does Snow White ever overreact, get moody over PMS, does she ever nag about the socks on the floor or how the prince should get a better job so that the prince gets annoyed and escapes to the pub with other princes? Does happily ever after mean that Snow White doesn't need professional help to process the several murder attempts on her by her step mother, and is nobody questioned by the authorities over the death of this murderous woman? Do they ever get sick, Snow White and her prince - in the land of happily ever after is it possible for Snow White to get Alzheimer's and the prince prostrate cancer? Or does the prince leave Snow White in his 50s for a younger woman who he claims looks at him like Snow White used to? And what does happily ever after mean once they get old - do they die the exact same time for natural causes or is the other one left behind to live the happily ever after by themselves?

Of course the concept of happily ever after is as magical as the rest of the fairytales, and we all know it; and yet we seem to seek it, even if we don't properly even know what it means. It is a vague idea of things being better than they are now and this is why it is so easy to be unhappy, stressed and frustrated. Clinging onto something unattainable and undefined could really not lead into any other outcome.

There will always be things which you cannot influence but that do influence you, things that make you angry or sad or afraid. Just like there will always be things that are wrong in the world, that feel unjust or unfair; and the thing is that this is alright.

It's perfectly fine not to be happy all the time. 

What matters is how you deal with your expectations not being met  - in other words, how much power do the things outside your control have over you?

Dealing with that is, in the end, what happily ever after is made of.

1 comment:

anni maarit said...

to reply to the commentator whose comment i can no longer see here - feel free.ichid